We have the distinguished honor of being on the committee for raising five million dollars for placing a statue of Bill Clinton in the Hall of Fame in Washington D.C.

This committee was in a quandary as to where to place the statue.

It was not wise to place it beside the statue of George Washington, who never told a lie, nor beside Senator Joe McCarthy, who never told the truth, since Bill Clinton could never tell the difference.

We finally decided to place it beside the statue of Christopher Columbus, the greatest Democrat of all.

He left not knowing where he was going, did not know where he was, returned not knowing where he had been, and did it all on borrowed money.

Over 5,000 years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the Promised Land!"

Nearly 5,000 years later, Roosevelt said, "Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a Camel, this *IS* the Promised Land!"

Now, Bill Clinton is going to steal your shovels, kick your asses, raise the price of Camels, and mortgage the Promised Land.

If you are one of the fortunate few who has anything left after taxes, we expect a generous contribution to this worthwhile project.

Fraternally,
The Bill Clinton Statue Committee